Wednesday, April 20, 2005
Delicate Balance
There is an interesting balance in friendships. One must be careful not to say somethings and to express others. One must know when to touch when not to. With some it is easier because the relationship is more defined or it is simply less close on some levels. Sometimes I agree with Rob, I should just give up on social lives.
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I would like to switch his words about if I could. I would not say give up on a social life, just give in. Forget the rules and walls we and socialty places up. Follow your heart and let the sprit guild you. It is never wrong to care for someone. Play this game of life like you got nothing to lose.
i'm not sure i have anything to lose anymore.
Rob told me today that CS Lewis once said (and I paraphrase), "Having friends doesn't increase survivability, but it does make it life worth surviving."
I realised when I was in LA alone that I could live a hermit-like existence. I could read books forever, write whatever I liked forever, watch movies forever, play video games forever... basically I could exist without friends. But friends make life more fun and interesting.
I know that during the few weeks leading up to finals I was a bit outcast from the group, mainly by my own choosing. I mean I still hung out with Trevor for soccer, Matt for chatting or Mike for study, but I basically avoided everyone else. Most of that was because I am an over-achiever and I was genuinely studying, but some of it was because there was too much drama in our group that I just wanted to avoid.
Then after finals I realised I should probably try to hang out with the group more, and I realised how cool it was to again sit and chat with Benson boy or talk to Su on the phone or argue with Renae, or play soccer with Amie.
There might be pain, but I realised that if you aren't willing to risk some pain then you don't deserve any rewards. And like you said, you have nothing to lose. Or in a more optimistic way, you have everything to gain...
And Stuff,
~Vasu
Heh... balance was key to the Greek philosophers and their ideas of life. What does the Church say about balance? There does need to be opposition in all things, however I would argue that we should strive toward that which brings the most good in our lives. Kels, if traisping around with a group of friends or being by yourself brings you satisfaction and joy, so be it.
Though it's hard sometimes, especially when labels are given that are somewhat less than desirable, I say keep on truckin' and do that which those around you can't predict. Life really does hurt... often really. But the key is knowing that once you do make it to the top, after not giving into the outside pressures around you, the end goal will be that much sweeter.
Don't disappear for too long. It's sad when you aren't around to just "balance" out whatever the mood tends to be in our little groupy. Be strong enough.
*hugs*
Balance is good, and watching people interact is always so much fun. I might sound wierd but that is one of my favourite things to just sit and watch and then usual I go hey why am i not out there being a part of that dance. and so i jump on in. It gets confusing but really just taking things as they come works out real well.
And never ever give up on a social life. friends are way to important. they are also apart of the balance in our lives and to give up on it would be a horrible thing.
Miss you hun and talk to you later.
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